Sometimes Being Alone Is Hard

There are hard days for any person or parent. Today was one of those.

There were times during pregnancy, labor, delivery, postpartum when a partner would have been nice.

There were multiple times while I was pregnant when I wished I could have had a partner to remind me everything’s gonna be okay when I’m crying in the middle of the night because my heartburn made me have to pee or something. Also, juice deliveries would have been nice, but DoorDash came through.

Someone to hold me when I was in labor the first night and I sat alone in a hospital room curled up in pain and the nurse said “Well it’s labor. It’s not supposed to feel good”. Or hold my hand at hour 43 when they told me I’d have to have a C-section.

Sometimes I think it’d be helpful to be able to bounce parenting ideas off someone or have them encourage me with breastfeeding or hold the baby while I shower. Someone who loves him just as much as I do who will always be thinking of his best interests and can share what sometimes feels like the weight of the world.

As Lorelei Gilmore once said: “You know there are very few times in my life when I find myself sitting around, thinking I wish I was married, but today... I... I'm happy, you know? I like my life, I like my friends, I like my... stuff. My time, my space, my TV.

“But every now and then, just for a moment I wish I had a partner, someone to pick up the slack, someone to wait for the cable guy, make ME coffee in the morning. Meet the stupid sink before it gets shipped back to Canada!“

Nothing happened that I’ll remember next week. Today was just hard.